Before I get down into the nitty gritty, I’m just going to say that there’s been no one incident that has prompted this post, but rather a series of personal experiences and recent observances from the wider world that got me thinking. You see, quite recently I think there’s been a trend of people expecting that we should just take their shit.
Sometimes, it’s family, other times friends, even colleagues. Sometimes it’s wider societal expectations and pressures placed upon us. And it’s fair to say that these issues affect non-witches as well as those of us who identify as such, but seeing as this is a blog about witchcraft, this is the angle I will be taking.
I sometimes think as well that people often assume that because of what we do, our practices and such, we are more able to deal with their nonsense, or perhaps it just boils down to people not engaging their brain before opening their mouths, or maybe even just not caring. And the whys and reasons don’t really matter because ultimately it all boils down to the same thing – people thinking we have to take their shit.
So what exactly do I mean? Well, the truth is it can mean many different things. It might present itself as others coming to you for help but never being there when you are the one in need of support. It might be your nearest and dearest mocking or shaming your practice and beliefs . Other times it might be questioning decisions you make when you decide to respect yourself or blaming you when you move yourself away from damaging or even abusive relationships. It can be outrage when you decide to take a stand and stick up for yourself instead of rolling over and just taking, well, shit. Sometimes it might be one of the above or none and quite often it might be multiple issues rolled up into one big mess.
But you know what, we don’t have to take that shit.
You do not owe anyone anything. You do not have to let it eat away at you, taking up your time, effort, energy and power. You do not have to leave yourself feeling guilty, miserable or emotionally exhausted, all of which detracts from your witchcraft practice.
It can be difficult distancing yourself from it all at first, especially when it comes from family and friends. But you must. Never apologise for doing so. It seems that just lately the love and light brigade (the magickal and non magickal branches)have us thinking that we need to heal others whilst sacrificing ourselves. We do not.
The truth is that we just have to remove ourselves from situations and people who are damaging. We are not responsible for them. We are not responsible for healing other peoples trauma when they do not want to take an active part in their healing. Sometimes we have to tell those we care about most to mind their own business, to just shut up, especially when their opinions are hurtful and harmful instead of helpful.
Ultimately I guess I’m just gently reminding you that you are a magickal badass being and that you do not have to take shit from anyone. I keep saying let 2020 be the year of the witch, let it be the year of action, rebellion and resistance but in order for that to be, we need to get our own houses in order by taking a stand and saying a big fat no to taking shit from anybody!